3 minutes. 3 hours. 3 days. 3 weeks. 3 months. 3 years. 3 decades.

Playing a little fast and loose with timelines, but that seems pretty close to what the independence milestones look like for a kid growing up. A camp friend passed these timelines on to me, and I thought they tracked. Let's break them down.

3 minutes is the first time you feel comfortable leaving your kid out of your sight (maybe in a crib, or a playpen contraption).

3 hours is the first morning they're with a babysitter or at daycare.

3 days is that first long weekend sleepover with the grandparents or the cousins.

3 weeks (let's come back to this one).

3 months is the first semester at college.

3 years is after college, out in the world with a first job and a first apartment.

3 decades is settling down, starting a family, and getting into life for the long haul.

The fuzzy math mostly tracks. And it’s pretty linear all things considered. Not everyone’s timeline is going to look exactly the same, but these are pretty standard stops along the way.

And then there’s that three week stretch…

How Kids Used To Practice

Before I get to that, it’s worth saying that the number of steps kids take away from home is shrinking every year. When we were kids, it was go play until the street lights come on. Now even the playground is full of grown-ups.

And independence is definitely a skill to hone and practice. It's something you learn how to do, just like anything else.

Throw a kid straight into the deep end and it will rightfully be panic time. Keep them in the living room and nothing new happens. There’s got to be blocks of time along the way where you get a little bit of practice at it so the next big thing seems considerably more manageable.

That 3 Week Thing

Look at that list again and almost every step kind of just ends up happening in the run of everyday life. Daycare has a start date because everyone’s got to go back to work. Grandma plans out the long weekend. College sends a move-in day for that first semester with a dorm room assignment.

But the 3-week thing doesn’t leave us a lot of options out there. The three weeks is different. Nobody mails you an invitation for it and honestly, it could be easy to skip.

And skipping it leaves a giant gap in the middle of the list: a kid whose longest run away from home is a weekend at grandma's, walking into a dorm for three months.

Camp really is one of the few in-betweens. We hear this from camp families all the time. Because it’s true. They can see it at those first drop-offs with the rest of the freshmen. They’ve gotten a bunch of 3 and 6-week stretches under their belts. The climb up the independence ladder followed a rather simple progression.

I’m not going to list all the ways this happens during a stretch at camp, except to say the days and weeks stack the whole way.

One Question To Ask

Parents ask me how to know if their kid is ready for this rung. I keep it simple: did they do the one before it? A kid who's done the three days at grandma's is ready for three weeks at camp. A kid who hasn't should probably do that first.

K&E is set up for just that. First-summer campers can come for three weeks, half the summer, move on to the full six-and-a-half when ready.

And sure, I'll be straight with you: I want every kid here for the whole summer eventually. The full summer is the full experience. We plan camp to run Day 1 to Day 45, right in that order with the days and weekends building on each other. But if your family is new to camp, three weeks is often the right-sized rung.

The ladder mostly climbs itself. Minutes turn into hours, hours turn into days, and one day it's decades, and they're building a life of their own.

The three weeks is the one rung you have to go get on purpose. We saved you a spot.

You got this,

Jack

PS - What do you think about this timeline? Does it land? Would love feedback if you want to hit reply and let me know.

Another PS - There's still time to get set up for your 3 weeks (or 6.5 weeks) this summer. Plus, register now and get the next K&E gear drop, this K&E hoodie. Register here!​

114 Eagle Pond Rd, Wilmot, NH 03287
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