Last month, we had a K&E reunion in Boston.
Pool party. Bunch of us were there.
Campers, families, alumni.
It was great. Had a blast playing HORSE, soccer, and eating so much pizza.
Oh and there was this one small moment where a kid realized she’d forgotten her bathing suit.
She could have sat out. Missed the swim time. Felt weird about not being in the pool with her friends. Or even felt bad about forgetting in the first place.
Nope. None of it. Totally the opposite. She jumped into the pool fully clothed.
Friends immediately offered a sweatshirt so she wouldn’t be cold after. Someone else suggested drying her clothes under a hairdryer. She stayed in the pool, stayed included, stayed having fun.
Nobody panicked. Nobody made it weird.
The whole group just defaulted to helping her out without thinking twice about it.
That’s not some happy accident.
That’s what happens when you practice something over and over until it becomes who you are.
What you’re actually seeing
That moment could have gone differently.
At some camps, that becomes a problem to solve. At others, it becomes a lesson about preparation or responsibility.
At K&E, it just became a moment where kids figured it out together.
Why is that?
Because kindness at K&E isn’t treated as a personality trait or a vague value. It’s practiced. It’s prompted. It’s reinforced in real time.
Counselors guide kids toward kind responses in the moment. When kindness shows up, it gets rewarded socially. When it doesn’t, the moment gets redirected gently.
Over time, those prompts become instinct.
How prompts work
Kindness operates as a behavioral cue rather than a moral ideal.
When something happens, adults guide children toward a kind response right then.
Counselor prompts sound like:
“Let’s go check on our friend.”
“We won, let’s say good game.”
“What do you think they need right now?”
These aren’t rules. They’re small cues that guide behavior.
The loop looks like this:
A moment occurs → A prompt guides behavior → A response follows → The response gets rewarded socially (smiles, relief, group is cool together, etc) → The behavior becomes more likely next time.
This is basic behaviorism. Behavior gets rewarded, behavior repeats.
At K&E, kindness gets rewarded socially. Kids learn fast which behaviors work.
Not all camps do this well. Some prioritize discipline. Some prioritize achievement or performance.
Camp prioritizes teaching kids how to respond to each other.
Not through rules, but through culture. And it’s why someone jumping into a pool fully clothed is like this amazing moment when it could have been a day-ruiner.
Why it matters
Rules define boundaries while prompts define culture.
When kids respond with kindness over and over, it stops being something to think about. It becomes instinct. And it becomes who you are.
That’s what builds the friendships that last.
That’s what makes kids feel safe, included, and proud to belong.
Kids aren’t learning to be kind. They’re just practicing being kind in hundreds of small moments.
And those moments compound.
What this looks like at camp
Every day at K&E, there are dozens or hundreds of these moments.
A kid drops something during a game. Another kid helps pick it up.
Someone struggles on the high ropes course. The group cheers louder.
A camper is in their feels during rest hour. A bunkmate sits with them.
Counselors prompt. Kids respond. The community rewards it.
That’s not soft. That’s intentional.
Stuff will happen this summer. Some of it unexpected. But kids will know how to respond.
Because kindness isn’t a rule. It’s a practice.
Best,
Sylvia
PS - I love talking camp with anyone and everyone. Have some questions about summers at K&E? Let's meet!
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